Fucking awesome night tonight!
4 :24 am and I'm just getting home. Normally I would be calling Narc right about now. No... Normally, that would have happened an hour ago. Normally, I'd be fucking Narc right now. Fuck. I'm not happy with how all of that went down and still have hopes to change it.
Anyway... Have to update this thing tomorrow. IrishBird and PumpedUp are taking off for Vegas together tomorrow. It's a secret though, so don't tell...
I'm a happy Hyde. I hate that alcohol makes me feel happy. Because of that, I almost wish I were never happy. (If it were due to alcohol, that is...). Narc also makes me happy. But he's not here. And he also makes me unhappy. So fucking miserably unhappy! He hurts me. But he also fills my heart. I feel like a stupid girl, but he confuses me. Is that bad? I miss him, and no matter how hard I try, I can't stop loving him. Oh well... Nothing else to do but to mourn... And to hope I don't still love him tomorrow...
Ok. Got to go wash off my pounds of makeup and get into bed. NDN was my date tonight to a black tie (optional) affair. My second cousin had his Bar Mitzvah. Good times.... Good times... I have to blog about all that later.
I love the people at Cheers. Fucking love them. IB, PumpedUp, BarMan, ThursdayGirl and I... We all chilled way beyond after hours. As for me and NDN--we had a great time at the Bar Mitzvah too. Will have to update on all...
Later...
-hydey-
4 comments:
There's nothing wrong with alcohol making you happy so long it's not the only thing that makes you happy. It certainly makes me happy.
However, I submit to you that Narc doesn't make you happy, he makes you unhappy. If he really made you happy you wouldn't be trying to forget about him.
Yay for you & happiness getting it on!
And put a 20 on black for me in Vegas!
"I'm not happy with how all of that went down and still have hopes to change it"
What do you hope to change?
I hope its not him
Shenandoah -- hey, the song came out with really good quality on my computer. I made Cowboy listen to it and he said "Quite lovely!" Miss you!
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