A man named "Johnny Bello" just swore to me (on his mother's grave) that I have the most beautiful eyes he's seen in NY since he's been here (which is about 20 years). And then he gave me a gross slobbering kiss on the eyelid. Ew! Ew! Gross....
There's a lot else on my mind, but not anything that I'm ready to share with blogland.
As for my dinner party with Narc, he can't make it. He wrote to me the other day:
Doing horribly--cough, fever, nausea, etc. Think we'll have to postpone.
I wrote back twice:
Oh no! And I'm just starting to feel better. Let me know if you need me to bring anything- food, meds, etc. Seriously, call if you need me, ok? Hope you feel better soon!
and then,
My phone just said "msg. error." So, in case you didn't get it, I wrote that you should call me if you need anything at all-- supplies or company. And take care!
Hmm...
Later in the week, Hammer writes to me:
Narc is your Mr. Big!
I agree. And think of him. And miss him.
Fuck it. I have a major crush on him. Major. MAJOR. I'm crushing on him all the time.
But fuck it, because I have no control over who I crush on.
So, let's scrap that topic and move on to B...
I finally agreed to meet B's girlfriend (which is going to kill my soul, but that's okay, I'll learn to take it). He knows that, so he writes (and this is a much edited version of his message):
Anyway, looks like we're on for dinner on Friday evening, around 8:30 in the Kips Bay area. I told (my girlfriend) about it in a casual way and she agreed. And she looked scared! I'm kinda nervous too. I've actually felt awful about this whole thing all day. I feel like I have no right to ask you to do this, and I have no words to express how much this means to me. I love you so much it hurts. Till the end of time.
-b
And I love him too. I would have married him. It makes me wonder about Narc...
-h
(PS: Yes, I've had a few drinks, so this post may come down in the morning, as it's a little too personal. If you're lucky enough to catch it, well, then... lucky you! Then again, maybe I'll read it, decide it's okay, and leave it up... h)
6 comments:
I think "major crush" is a step up from "love," don't you? Sounds like you're indeed working him out of your life which I think is for the best.
As far as the Bello guy, how did he land a kiss on your eyelid? Were you drunk at the time? I would have expected faster reflexes from you. I hope you gave him a shove or something.
Ahhh, Keep it up, unless you don't want B to read that you love him and you would have married him, though I think you were engaged, right?
Anyway, you wrote it, which means you meant it, yet if you feel it's too personal, I understand that. Just glad I got to read it.
Honestly, Dan-- I let him plant one there just so he would leave me alone. I didn't realize how wet and gross it would be. But even so, can you picture me shoving ANYONE away like that???
Sunshine-- I'm awake after just 4 hours of sleep and still haven't decided to take it down, although I still may change my mind. B and I were never formally engaged, although he did kind of propose at one point and we lived together for three years...
-h
Eeewww, just the thought of someone kissing my eyelid is making me cringe. Yuck.
Charbs - under the right circumstances someone kissing your eyelids would be quite nice, I believe. But a stranger....yeah, ewww!
giggling at Mystic!
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