It's Raining Men, but I Don't Have an Umbrella! (Part I)

This is going to be one of those posts in pieces. I'll give you everything here, except my time with Narc. That will be forthcoming in the next post.

Although I did basically not a stitch of school work this weekend, I have to say-- I had a pretty amazing time. I don't feel well rested and I don't feel resolution of any kind, and in fact, I've fallen behind in everything I am supposed to be doing, but that's okay. It was a weekend of aristocratic pleasures-- enjoying sensory experiences and love.

As I write this post, I'm sitting in the library at Columbia, waiting for my choir rehearsal to begin. I'm writing on my laptop, but the laptop screen cracked a few weeks ago. As such, there are huge black ribbons snaking through these words and I can't see everything that I type. Please excuse any subsequent typos or spelling errors.

I took the bus up here in the rain, following a voice lesson this afternoon and an early dinner at La Caridad-- a favorite Chino-Latino restaurant on 78th street and Broadway. (B and I used to eat there regularly). As I was leaving my voice lesson, my cell phone rang. I didn't recognize the number so I picked it up. It was a man.

"Hyde?"

"Yeah... Who's this?"

(I always get worried when unfamiliar men call me!)

"It's Pete," he began.

Pete?!?! That's the guy who I met in the elevator upon leaving voice lessons on Friday afternoon. (You can read about that here.) I really didn't want to deal with this.

"Um, hold on!" I answered. "I can't hear you It's static-y. I'm in the elevator!"

"Okay," he said. "I'll call you back in ten minutes."

Just then, the elevator paused to pick up another passenger. The doors slowly opened. And in walked Pete! Unbelievable!

"Hyde!" he exclaimed, cell phone in hand. "I just called you!"

"Yeah, I know. I told you I was in an elevator!"

The whole situation made me uncomfortable. I mean, what are the chances? Was this guy stalking me or something?

"So, what are you up to tonight, Hyde?"

"Um... I can't hang out. I have a choir rehearsal."

"What time is that?"

"7:00. But I have to go to the library first." I pointed to the laptop on my arm.

"Oh, yeah, of course. What about tomorrow night?"

"Well, I teach. I mean, I'm busy weeknights. I won't really have anything open up until the weekend."

"Sure, sure. I understand. So I'll give you a call this weekend?"

"Um, yeah... Okay."

How do I get myself into these things?

Anyway I took the bus to 78th street, ate my dinner and decided to call back the Stallion. (He had called me a second time (on Sunday night) when I was with the Narc). If I didn't call him back, it would be sending a pretty clear message-- one that I'm not entirely sure I was ready to send. On the other hand, I didn't really have much to say to him, and given the fact that I am feeling deeper and deeper in love with Narc, I don't even really want to see him... I called him anyway.

"HEY, girl! What's up? It's so good to hear from you!"

Our conversation proceeded awkwardly. He asked me what I've been up to these past few months. I asked him what he's been up to.

"Work."

"Work," we both replied.

"So... when am I going to get to see you?" he began. "Tonight I may be in the city, you know..."

"Well, tonight's not so good for me. I have to be up early tomorrow to teach and I have choir tonight until late. I probably won't have any time open up til the weekend."

(Didn't I just have this conversation?)

"Well, maybe Saturday night," he suggested. "I could take you for something to eat."

"Yeah, maybe. Look-- why don't you just give me a call later in the week?"

"I'll do that," he said. "Stay out of the rain tonight, and take care, cutie."

"Yeah, it's already raining, but I don't even have an umbrella."

"I wish you could see me right now," he said. "I wish you could see the kind of enormous smile you just put on my face-- just thinking of you."

"Well, I'll have to imagine it. Talk to you soon..."

(I wanted to ask him if he would be smiling like that if he knew I didn't want to have sex with him. I thought of Hammer and the Arch and of having sex with people you don't really want to just because you're there in that situation. And the whole thing made my chest feel constricted.)

I tried to think of Narc again. I tried to make myself smile. But then B called me on the phone and told me he was feeling depressed.

"You and Narc, both," I said. "Why are the men in my life always depressed?"

Anyway, all of this is epilogue to my rather beautiful weekend.

Thursday and Friday night were both late nights for me-- out boozing at Cheers until all hours of the night. As such, when my mom came to pick me up on Saturday morning to go see La Nozze de Figaro, I was worried that she would see through the layers of under-eye concealer and be angry at me for my hangover. (Alcohol is a touchy issue in my family. She didn't say anything though.)

The night before I had been planning on taking it easy, but I was tempted out by NDN to indulge in some "night life." We went to a new place in our neighborhood the Mambi Lounge. There we drank mojitos and talked about a million and one things, including our upcoming trip to Argentina in December. (The mojitos were good, but I have to say-- the best mojitos I ever had were at Point 101-- a bar in London on Oxford Street near Tottenham Court Road). I had a great time and learned some more about my neighbor. On the way back home (at around 2:30 am) we stopped at Duane Reade where we each made strange purchases-- NDN bought a red disco ball and I bought the cruelest magnate I've ever seen--it was a photo of a kitten in the toilet, it's little paw hanging over the edge. The caption said "Goodbye Cruel World!" I don't know why I bought it. I think I'm going to throw it out.

NDN hung out at my place for a little while, although he was tired and I was just getting revved up. Eventually, he decided to go home and I decided to go back out, hanging out at Cheers until nearly 5:00 am. Hence, when my mom picked me up at noon the next day, I was not in good shape.

The opera soon remedied that. Sometimes, amidst all the drama, I forget how much I love Mozart. I forget how perfect and funny and sparkling and charming Figaro is. Not to mention, I've sung almost the entire opera in bits and pieces in various concerts, recitals, ensemble groups and choirs, (as Mozart is good for young voices), so the music brought back a lot of memories. My mom enjoyed it too. The funniest moment-- when she tried to eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in the theater during intermission. (You're not supposed to eat in the auditorium, and she was trying to be sneaky but she was doing a very bad job of it. I started laughing and then she started laughing and then neither of us could stop.)

After the opera, my mom drove me home and then Hammer called. She was at the school library (which is not far from my place). As the library was closing, I told her to come over to for dinner. She was preparing for a 4-mile run the next morning and wanted to eat lasagna for dinner. We ordered in some food (she had a steak and spinach lasagna while I had artichokes) and we just got to talking about a lot of things-- including the PunyBoy/telling Narc I love him story-- it was the one year anniversary of those events. (Obviously, I posted about them here.)As such, we decided to co-write a post, and had a lot of fun doing it. We laughed and laughed to retell those stories again.

Soon enough, NDN called. He was on his way home with the DVD of Napoleon Dynamite. Hammer and I asked him to get us some ice cream and told him to come over to watch. We ate the ice cream and NDN ate an avocado and we all three hung out and gossiped and watched the movie.

To be frank, as much fun as I was having with my friends, I was feeling a little anxiety about my relationship with Narc. The week before, I had seen or spoken to him nearly every single day. This past week, I had only spoken to him once and hadn't seen him at all. He had rejected my offer of company on Thursday night, and I was feeling very sad about the whole thing. That, combined with a previous conversation with Dan contributed to how upset I got upon reading his comment. I just wanted Narc to call me, and he wasn't calling. And I wasn't sure what to think or feel.

Hammer stayed until around 11:30 (leaving her bike in my hallway), and I continued to obsess on the computer, both angry and hurt at Dan's remarks and stressed out about Narc. It didn't help to feel this way on the one-year anniversary of declaring my devotion to him. I fiddled on the computer until I was so exhausted I could take it no more, and then I decided to go to bed. I wandered into the bedroom where I had left my cell phone, only to discover I had a message waiting. It was from Narc!

What?!?!?

So while I was at the computer pining over him, I missed his call the hour before!

He said:

Hey Hyde, it's Narc.

It's a little after 11:00, I think. And uh, I just wrapped a meeting which I thought would take quite a bit longer, but it actually went pretty quickly--with some friends over at Bar and Books. And I'm now in the West Village and I'm just kind of wandering downtown... It looks like I have to meet my troupe out on the Lower East Side in a little bit. That's not going to happen for an hour or two, or something. So I was going to see what you were up to. And I might pop in over at Cheers and have a few Jack & Cokes with you in the meantime. So, I didn't know if you were there or not tonight. But, well... Give me a call back, tonight, if you like.

Alright. Bye.

Well, as you know, I called him back. And we went on to have an absolutely beautiful night together. But as the witching hour is approaching, and I have to get to my choir practice, I leave you, for now, with that...

-h-