The Detox Formula

This weekend was relatively tame. I was home sick all day on Friday. I had a really strange episode that morning-- I was flushed and sweating and almost fainted. It hasn't happened again since then, but I've been consistently fatigued. Hammer wanted me to go see that play "Narcise" with her on Friday night, and I agreed even though I was feeling crappy. However, when we got to the theater, it was sold out. Instead, we headed to our favorite "after-German-class" diner near St. Marks, browsed a Japanese food mart, and headed home. On the way home, I stopped in Cheers but didn't drink anything. It was quiet there since it was so early (only around 10:30 or so) and I sang a few numbers. I told BarMan that I was sick and that they shouldn't let me sing into microphone, but he said not to worry about it. I hope I don't get their whole clientele sick!

So early to home and early to bed it was. The next morning I got up and watched the Royal Wedding on TV. Then I took off for the library. It was such a beautiful day out. I picked up a cup of coffee and a pack of cigarettes on my way there and sat in Bryant Park for a while, just enjoying the day. The first spring tulips were everywhere, and the sunshine felt so good on my face (even though I hate the summer). I probably shouldn't have been smoking, given that I'm sick, but I have to say--it was my favorite moment of the weekend. Finally I got myself to head into the library to do some work. A few hours later, Hammer showed up and we took a lunch break. I stayed at the library probably until around 4:30 or so.

When I got home, I cleaned up my house and cooked some chicken. NextDoorNeighbor came by for a while to chat. It was a very strange conversation, which I'd love to recount, but I promised him not to break his confidence. At around 7:30 I left to meet Hammer for our second attempt at "Narcise." It was an extremely odd play-- too post-modern for it's own good. Two of the leading female characters were wearing enormous Elizabethan dresses made from tin-foil and wrapping paper. Everyone danced non-stop, even while delivering lines that had nothing to do with dance, and there was some trippy soundtrack with lyrics like "I'm such a Narcise! I'm such a Narcise!" It was amusingly entertaining, but hardly great art.

I was really feeling run down though. While we went out for coffee after, I was sure to be home and fast asleep by midnight. In the process, I ignored several calls from the deli man, which I have to confess, I do feel guilty about. The next morning I woke up early to head out to Long Island. I met BigSis and Bro-In-Law at the train station and we caught up on gossip on the way there. My stepbrother is doing better and better. He kept pulling his leg up to his face for some reason though--it was kind of weird. I really started to feel worse (full on sore throat, cough, runny nose, extreme fatigue, etc.), so I didn't want to go too close to him. Instead, I fell asleep in the waiting room! My great aunt and uncle (on my mom's side) showed up for a visit, which was really odd, given that they don't have a very close relationship with my stepbrother and we hardly ever see them. Somehow we got into a discussion about their visit to East Germany when it was still behind the Iron Curtain. IrishBird texted me and asked me to brunch (I guess she missed me on Saturday night!), but I told her that I couldn't make it.

I got back to my place at around 4:30. While I had originally intended to do some work, I seemed to be full-on sick and ended up falling asleep on the couch. I woke up about three hours later feeling like hell. I called my mom to whine to her for a bit. She told me to try to get some food in me and to go to sleep early. So I walked to the Chinese place across the street and got some wonton soup. Then I stopped in at the deli and got some tea. Back at home, I watched the finale to "Strange Love" in bed. I have to say--Flav and Brigitte really are a very strange couple. I was asleep by 10:30.

This morning I woke up, once again, feeling like hell, but since I only teach for an hour and a half on Mondays, I figured I could slog through. It was not fun though. I was drenched in sweat trying to keep my energy up during the lesson and my voice was all hoarse by the end. I told my students that I'm sick (as if they couldn't tell), so I hope that they'll be forgiving. Ughh. I cancelled my voice lesson for this afternoon, but I am going to try to make it to German by 3:00 today.

That's it for now, I guess.

Anyway, here are some numbers that I've been thinking about:

1.) Yesterday was the 2 month anniversary of flushing my medicine.

2.) Yesterday was 1 month until Narc's birthday. I'll have to fight myself to keep from sending him a "happy birthday" text.

3.) Yesterday was 2 weeks until my stepbrother turns 18. :(

3.) Today is the 1st time I've gone a whole week with no contact to or from Narc (including drunk messages).

4.) Today will be my 5th day with no alcohol. (I'm hoping to make it to the 1 week mark, even if it doesn't count because I'm sick.)

5.) Speaking of being sick, this is the 6th time I've been sick this year! Guess I've lost some of the resiliency of my youth!

Well, I'm off to nap and then to do some German homework. If there's one thing that sickness is good for--it's helping me detox both from alcohol and from user-boys. I've lost the taste for both while I feel this crappy. That said, I do hope this awful cold/cough passes as quickly as it came.

lol,

-sniffling hyde-